It’s Sunday evening, and your boss questions a decision you thought was settled. Your instinct might be to respond defensively, but there’s a better way to handle these moments of selective memory without losing your cool.
Why it matters: As you climb the career ladder, encountering a boss with selective memory becomes more frequent. How you respond can either make you indispensable or reflect poorly on you. Understanding the real reasons behind their forgetfulness and addressing it constructively is key to maintaining a positive dynamic.
The big picture: Often, a boss’s selective memory isn’t about distrust but rather the result of their busy schedule and the multitude of decisions they juggle. Sometimes, new information or second thoughts prompt their queries. Your reaction should foster clarity and alignment, not defensiveness.
What they’re saying: “As a reminder, we decided to do X because of Y and Z. Has something changed in your thinking?” This approach reminds your boss of the decision’s rationale and opens the door for them to share new insights or doubts, maintaining respect and assuming good intentions.
The bottom line: While it’s natural to feel frustrated by a boss’s selective memory, responding with patience and understanding strengthens trust. For those rare cases where the issue persists due to poor leadership, it might be time to consider moving on. Remember, this challenge is part of growing in your career and dealing with higher-level executives.
Hat Tip to Personal Math